Looks like we'll be parents to a cute little girl named Jessica as well as a wonderful little boy named Malot.
It's unbelievable to watch Malot with Jessica. He spontaneously will decide to put lotion on her (which is a very necessary thing for them) and he just loves to rub her arms. He kisses her and loves on her and talks to her in a little "baby talk" voice. He seems to know when she needs help with something and he's just right there for her. She walks a bit, but is very unsteady. I turned around today to find Malot holding Jessica's hand to help her walk to Pappa today. He'd seen her try to stand up and wanted to make sure she could do it.
He also has been very understanding with her. As you would expect, he's been extra clingy to me since we brought Jessica with us on Thursday. He's constantly walking over and asking me to pick him up. He just lays his head on my shoulder and strokes my neck. But Friday morning, I was holding Malot and Brent was in the shower when Jessica started crying. I turned Malot and said (in plain old English), "Malot, can you jump off so I can hold Jessica?" and he said, "Wi" and slid off my lap and walked over to Jessica and patiently waited. I was so shocked (I'd been expecting a fight because he's been so clingy) that I knelt next to him and said, "Merci beaucoup" and he grinned so widely! He KNEW he was helping and he was excited about it.
We've had some "sibling jealousy".... I've been calling Malot, "Bebe" and I say it with this silly inflection. When I call him that way, he always answers with "Wi?" or this cute little "Huh?" Well, on Thursday evening, I was playing with Jessica and I called HER "bebe". Malot stomped his little foot and let me know in no uncertain terms that HE was my "bebe" and that I was not to call HER by HIS nickname. It's quite funny when you have no doubt what a little boy in saying to you in Creole. I apologized ("Regrete, Malot. Momma regrete."). He nodded. My apology was accepted and he was mollified. All was again right in his world.
Malot has some very emotional concerns regarding food. These things happen when you go without food. He carried a granola bar or two with him the whole week. He just needed to know it was there if he needed it. He's thrown some huge fits over the panic he gets when he's not sure what's going to happen for food. And he doesn't want you to hold his granola bars. That's HIS and he needs to keep them or HE needs to put them down. He doesn't want you to take them away from him and set them down for him. So with that in mind, it was interesting to see that he does share with Jessica quite readily. He's given her one of his granola bars several times. He just seems to really enjoy making sure she's happy.
The whole thing seems pretty surreal, but then there's not a lot that's "normal" about adopting from Haiti. Why should selecting children be any different? It was also exactly what we needed. Neither Brent nor I were sure what we wanted to do, but Malot knew what he wanted. He wanted "Malot et Jessica" to "vini" with Momma.
I think I'll actually look forward to that day sometime down the road when Malot is terribly frustrated with his sister getting into his things again and I can say, "I don't know what to tell you, son. YOU picked her...."
2 comments:
I LOVED THIS POST AND AM SO HAPPY THAT YOU MADE THIS DECISION (with a little prompting from your son, of course)!!!! HURRAY!!!
The food thing makes me sad. you will have to keep an eye out for a great back pack for him to have when he gets home. many kids find it very comforting to have a backpack with them at all times full of foods, just so that they know it is available to them until they finally believe that they will always have enough to eat. heartbreaking that any child should have to worry about that. makes me pray for the millenium to come quickly!
Funny, on my first trip to Haiti to visit Kenley, I left adopting another little one too. But, I just knew Jenite was meant to be ours.
Congratulations!!
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