Tuesday, June 10, 2008

How Old Do You WANT Him to Be?

I've mentioned before that they aren't really sure when Malot's birthday is.

It's hard to gauge by fine-motor skills as their "needs" here are different. My friends' little girl can braid hair VERY well and she's only 4. Malot has a bit of MacGyver in him. When you live in an O (orphanage) you need a bit of MacGyver in you. Malot discovered a very loose thread on the hotel comforter, and pulled it until it was long enough for him to use and bit it off with his teeth. Then he tied it to his favorite machin (truck) so that he could pull it along behind him. That wasn't quite long enough for him, so he ended up tying that string with two strands of dental floss (clean, by the way) . Momma helped him with the lashing, but he did the initial design and concept all on his own. He knows how to bite off a thread with his teeth and and he recognizes when the ends of his knot are too long for his liking and he trims those tails down with his teeth as well.

So while he can tie knots he can barely hold a crayon. He has a very strange grip that he uses and he makes rows of loops while using faintest of pressure on his page. That seems to be what he does. The sizes of the loops are fairly consistent, so that's a good thing.

He's tiny - he's 37" tall and weighs about 25 lbs. They told us he was 3, going on 4. He does speak in full sentences in Kreyol. I can pick out about every 10th word. I've figured out that he asks for my permission before he opens a granola bar. He calls them "bonbon" because they're so sweet and sticky. We brought a BUNCH of granola bars, dried fruit, sandwich-filled crackers and fruit snacks with us. The granola bars are his favorite.

Anyway, we've been trying to figure out how old he is, as they apparently don't have any birth certificate information for him. I told that I hoped his birthday was late enough in the year that he would get to wait an extra year to start kindergarten. They turned to me and said, very seriously, "How old do you want him to be?" Given that there isn't a birth certificate for this child, someone has to decide and you can make him younger if you want. If you'd like him to turn 3 this year instead of turn 4 this year, we can do that.

We haven't exactly given them a response yet. But it is odd to think about. Surely with everything he's been through and will continue to go through for awhile, it seems it would be good to make him younger so that he has time to get caught up on English and adjusted to a new country and culture before he has to be launched into the cold cruel world of kindergarten.

Something to think about...

5 comments:

Maggie said...

I vote for younger...for just the reasons you give. He will have a lot of adjusting and catching up to do when he gets home.

It must have been so fun to watch him with the threads!

Maggie said...

Grandpa O says make his birthday October 6th...same as Good Ol' Sgt. Park!

Rachael said...

I totally agree with you - put his birthday late in the fall and keep him back for an extra year to catch up. Very wise thinking Lori.

The talking, motor skills, etc you mentioned - it sounds like the orphanage is right on target with the age. He might even be a young 4.

It would be cool to have his birthday on the day you bring him home :)

Olson Family said...

Just my two cents that you didn't ask for---He looks younger than about to turn four. If he has had nutrition issues in the orphanage, he may always be a little small if he is older, and it wouldn't hurt to err on the side of him not being the smallest kid at school. I have worked in daycares for years and lots of two year olds can speak full sentences, and even if he is three that means he is really smart. I can't wait until he comes HOME.
We will all pick up al ittle Creole in the meantime, my grandad was a born and bred a Louisiana Cajun and spoke it fluently.
Love you and miss you!

Anonymous said...

Lori, he knows how to tie knots!!! wow! He makes circles about the same size! I would definately say he's closer to 4, but I'm with you. A fall birthday is a great idea! He'll love being one of the oldest in his class, it's way cool! You could go for another September birthday- that would make 4 in the family. We do seem to have a tradition going here. February and September really do seem to be the only options! J.K. I'm so glad to hear how well things are going for you guys. I love the pictures and stories about Malot. He's adorable!
Love, Trudi

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