When I went to see him this last week, I took pictures of Malot and Jessica to show to the kind women who work there.
So there I am, at the nurse's station in the back of his office showing pictures to his two nurses. Of course, other nurses gather as well. I explain to the new arrivals that we're adopting from Haiti.
One of the women I've never seen before asks me if they were brother and sister. I say, "They will be..." and leave it for her to think about. That's one of those weird questions people often ask about adoptive children. I was prepared for it.
I wasn't prepared for what happened next.
The same woman asked something along the lines of, "Well, if they're not brother and sister, why are you getting both of them?" I explained that Malot kept talking about his friend Jessica, so we went back to the orphanage and found Jessica.
She looked at me, with this accusing eye and said rather condescendingly, "Well you KNOW they can't get married when they grow up, right??"
I pause for one heartbeat.... and I think to myself:
"Did she just say what I think she said? She must have, because that other nurse did a double-take and is now staring at her like she has weeds growing out of her nose. I'm guessing she heard the same thing I did. Who SAYS something like that? How am I supposed to respond to that? Think, Lori, think....I could say, "Well, that does it! If we can't sell their wedding presents to recover the costs of this adoption then I'm gonna call the whole thing off!" Is that too rude? Do I care? Seriously, he's FOUR and she's 18 months. Why, why, why would a person's mind even run in a direction where they would think we were expecting them to marry? What kind of idiot does she think I am? Actually, based on her question, I'm starting to believe there are a great many more types of idiots that I previously believed...."
...two heartbeats...
She was still staring at me, expecting a response to her bizarre question. I just looked at her steadily and said, "Yes, we're well aware of that."
7 comments:
Funny, you should have totally been serious, and acted mad that they couldn't marry!! People do say the dumbest things! Or you should have said "Oh we already have his wife picked out she lives in Bellingham!"
It's shocking how seriously misinformed SOME people are on the amazing blessings of building our families through adoption. ;)
Whait a minute wait a minute his future wife is right here in good old Utah. lol I feel bad for people who say dumb things, they probably do it all the time and have no friends, and that take the cake on dumb things to say(so far) I am sure we will all be able to share many great stories in the future.
unfortunately some people are painfully idiotic! And to maintain good karma we can't point it out!
ARE YOU SERIOUS? WOW THE LEVEL OF STUPIDITY AMAZES ME. I THINK WE SHOULD GATHER UP ALL THE "SPECAILS" AND START A TARD FARM. WHAT DO YA THINK?:o)
oh man, thanks for the laugh!!!! hahaha!!! now, my kids have problems understanding this. just yesterday andre told me again that he is going to marry me when he grows up. i told him that we can't get married because i'm already married to his daddy and because that would be against the law, but that we sure do love each other very much. then addie said she is going to marry jason, and i said the same thing to her. but they are 3 and 4. they don't quite get it yet. how old do you have to be to be a nurse?
and the sad thing, dear lori, is that you will continue to get so SO so SO many stupid things said to you about your adopted children that you are wise to learn now. just pause and respond civilly, even if later you kind of wish that you had said something very witty, because in the end you'll feel better about yourself. i think. sometimes i still wish my witty responses could come more quickly!
by the way...not long til i meet you and your littles in haiti!!!
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