Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a
stone?
Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?
If ye then,
being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall
your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?Matthew 7:9-11
THIS sums up what's so difficult about what we're going through. We know what we want. We've met and loved and held Lexi and Nathan. These are good things to want. These are righteous desires. Yet, sometimes we are told "no" because there is a bigger, though currently unseen, picture.
All we can imagine is Lexi and Nathan. They are all we've ever wanted, really. How could anything possibly be better for us than that happy, giggling, gleeful boy and that beautiful, sweet, tender little girl?
That doesn't mean that there isn't something better than we can imagine in store for us. But our experience of 10 years of childlessness and trials and feeling spiritually "bricked in" at times (like your prayers are bouncing off the ceiling) make it nearly impossible for us "deal".
People say that God doesn't give us more than we can bear. Perhaps He actually gives us EXACTLY more than we can bear so that we'll remember to lean on Him- to kneel so we can stand with Him.
I guess I'm having a tantrum, wanting what I want and "knowing" that only that will make us happy. I'm still OK with tantrums. We have to feel and we have to experience. That's also part of what it's all about.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Brat Fit
5 comments:
Who says that adults don't have meltdowns every now and again?
excellent thoughts, Lori. It is so hard to have faith that the Lord knows that all these things we go through are really for our good and are really going to work out--that his thoughts are not our thoughts and his ways are not our ways--I can say it and write it and believe it, but actually having faith in that is another matter. I will tell you that I know its true because I do. But its still hard, so feel free to throw a tantrum if you need to. :)
Amen! I'm imagining you - on the nasty linoleum floor of oh, say, Smith's - throwing a tantrum. Screaming at full voice, face turning red. Yep. It's clear in my mind. Keep screaming. Now, didn't that feel good?
Additionally...there is a gospel song that has always summed up how I feel. "He may not be there when you want Him, but He'll be right there - on time." Oh how we're praying. For you & Brent. For Bernadette. For the BFather. For little Lexi & Nathan. Remember: not one hair, not one little hair.
I check up on you daily via this blog and have so much admiration and love for you two. Love you tons!
Tanya Hughes in MD
This morning as I was getting ready for work, I was thinking about the answers to our prayers. You are correct that Heavenly Father will sometimes say "No", but he will also tell us "Not yet". Could this be a "Not yet" or "In the Lord's due time" situation that you are going through? My prayers and thoughts are with you both.
Luana Best
I agree with the "not yet" theory. I just taught my Primary Kids about Enos praying for the Lamanites and how he was told that he was rightous and faithful but it was not the time...I sometimes think I learn more in Primary being reminded of the simple principles than in RS:)
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